I recently had a rattlesnake of a woman kind and helpful lady tell me that ‘women wear lipstick, girls wear lip gloss‘ WHILE I WAS PUTTING ON LIP GLOSS. Needless to say, her views on FLAVORED lip gloss had her making the face people usually reserve for when they find an old dirty diaper in the backseat of their car. Thankfully, I’m so in love with this:
I didn’t care what she said. I almost have an orgasm when I put it on my lips. Well, I’m sure a dude would love it if that happened but I’m just kidding. I’m not quite there. Maybe if someone braided my hair while singing Joesph Arthur to me it would happen. It’s so good it makes me want to make out with myself- without any of the small talk usually needed before I *make out with someone.
But seriously.
It’s shiny but not “hey, look at all the lip gloss I have on my lips! Whoo hee! Stare at me and my lips please!” shiny. It’s tasty but not “whoa! I just went to the pantry and smeared frosting all over my lips and now am licking them so much they are going to get chapped, which will just cause me to add more lip gloss, which will fuel this vicious lip gloss cycle that will end in tears and very unpretty lips that will be flakier than a freshly baked croissant” tasty.
It’s the best $12 I’ve ever spent. And I’ve spent $12′s often.
And yes, I’m fully aware I can now be charged with writing an entire post on lip gloss. I never said I was anything but deeply superficial. Besides, the world is complicated and messy and we are all watching Iran and North Korea and too many shows with that damned Piers Morgan. A lip gloss post was necessary.
What’s the best purchase under $15 purchase you’ve made?
(And if you say something really heartfelt or meaningful about **buying a goat or something for someone in a third world country I’m going to feel like an ass. You have been warned.)
* The phrase ‘make out’ makes me feel like I’m 14, until I remember that when I was 14, I wasn’t kissing boys but playing Girl Talk (please let someone else know what board game I’m talking about) and having way too many conversations about the awesomeness of Jared Leto’s eyes Martha Stewart bedding. Truly.
** But I would be really impressed with you if you did. I’d like you almost as much as I like my lip gloss. And that’s saying something.
Lip gloss can be found here. (Or you can just click the picture, I’m fancy like that)
I LOVE GIRL TALK.
srsly. best game evs.
best purchase under $15 for me was ALSO lip gloss. it was from fresh in nyc, and the internet claims it was over 20 bucks, but i was pretty sure i only paid 15. i wonder if i got a deal in the store? i dunno. http://www.fresh.com/skincare/moisturizer-lips/sugar-lip-treatment TOTALLY STILL WORTH 22.50!!! :)
don’t worry. i’m shallow. ;)
Yes! I love that someone remembers that game.
Ohhh fresh. I got a fresh sample from sephora a while ago.. it was some appleseed something or other and it smelled so good I wanted to eat it. I always wanted to try that lip gloss but was worried I wouldn’t like it. Now I feel as though my life won’t be complete without it.
I totally know what you’re talking about, but unfortunately I never actually got to play Girl Talk :( Pretty Pretty Princess anyone?
and I love Revlon’s Infalliable lip gloss. great color and lasts a long time! it’s about $8 at most places. Otherwise I like Rimmel’s ‘Cosmic’ color lipgloss or Maybelline in Mauve. (both retail for about $5)
Ahhh, I totally used to play that! Oh, memories. It was always humiliating to wear the pimple stickers.
Best $15 I ever spent? Pretty much every pair of shoes I own… I love you, Ross and Marshalls.
Um, yum! Is that philosophy? Because if it is I have their Vanilla Birthday Cake and Kiss Me. And I’m IN LOVE with both! Perfectly glossy and perfectly tasty.
I just went on about lip gloss too. You really bring out the glossiness in me. (I’m not really sure what that means.)
Best for under $15 – ever? That’s haaaard. Hm probably this hair clip I’ve used to coif my hair for 6 yrs. That’s a long time to avoid slipping into the gaping hair accessory/stray sock black hole in the corner of my closet. I’m (too) excited that Amy mentioned Rimmel’s “Cosmic” – I wear that all the time.
My friends and I were too old when we encountered Girl Talk, we thought it was corny. But I bet it would be ubers fun now… Someone should bring that out at the next slumber party!
Girl Talk was awesome! I had that one, and one of my best girlies had the Mystery Date game. Too much fun. I miss you, 80s.
The best purchase I’ve made under $15 was likely a book of some sort… Because I’m a girl who knows how to party when she gets her hands on some dead prime ministers. Wait, that didn’t sound right at all… (“dead presidents” sounds much cooler, what with it being the name of a movie and all. Canadian money? Not so hardcore.)
Those little red zit stickers were the best! Why have they not come out with an updated version of this game?! Why?! Classic…
I’m sure I’ve got lots of great purchases under $15, but right now I’m coming up with nothin’ besides really good shampoo/conditioner.
i loved girl talk. seriously.
and the best thing I ever spent less than $15 on was…Twilight.
there. i said it.
Girl Talk was BY FAR my most favorite game. Right next to Mall Madness.
And Jared Leto? Who is Jared Leto? I think you mean JORDAN CATALANO!
Totally just stumbled on your blog & heart it to death. Subscribing!
Also, raise your hand if you played DREAM PHONE.
Hand IS RAISED!
Murad acne spot treatment.
I love love love Sunsilk repair cream. Seriously the only thing that tames The Beast, (ie my hair) I can pick it up for R25 (in South Africa) which is… $4.16. Thank you very much!
I just started watching The West Wing again…. this will be the 11th time… I need help
My best friend had Girl Talk and we played it all the time! I wanted my mom to get it for me but turns out she thought it was too scandalous or something haha.
My bestt purchase under $15 were my Sierra Designs mittens. Got them at an outlet and they are the ONLY things that get me through the frigid Canadian winter.
I remember Girl Talk! Wow, that was a long time ago. I’d happily still wear lip gloss over lipstick, I’ve never liked lipstick.
The woman who said that must have been OLD. Lip gloss is fun!
As far as my best purchase under $15….I’m going to have to go with the book Eat, Pray, Love.
A sundress for $11 at Old Navy. I practically live in this thing during the summer.
I love philosophy lip glosses.
Umm. What is it with you and getting unsolicited (not to mention CONDESCENDING) advice from near strangers? A certain hair commenter comes to mind…
In this woman’s defense, she was over the age of 60. For some reason I feel like older people can get away with saying stuff that others can’t.
Yet, I still complain about it.
Was this woman related to the Mallard? Yikes, how rude. Sephora lip gloss is too grown-up!
My favourite cheap purchase is the ten-dollar ballet flats I bought last year from Le Senza. Perfect for so many occasions!
I remember asking for Girl Talk for Christmas but my parents vetoed. I think they thought it would turn me into some kind of wild teenage rebel. I’d start hanging out at the mall and talking to boys – perish the thought! There are a lot of experiences I wasn’t allowed to partake in. *sigh*
I cannot think of the best thing I spent under $15 on unless I consider the money I spent developing the pictures of playing Girl Talk Truth or Dare with my best friends – bras on outside the clothing, lipstick (yes, lipstick, not lip gloss…I guess we were “women” at that age) used as war paint, etc. …It might be about time for me to burn those pictures. :)
Of course I remember Girl Talk! Did you ever play Mall Madness? (It even had credit cards! The Madness!
Seriously, lipstick? Ewe. Why would anyone want to look like they were cast in Melrose Place these days? Lip gloss is the way to go.
Lipgloss is not just for girls. I just converted my bf’s 60+-year-old mother into a gloss wearer after she admitted she hates the way lip stick makes her lips feel. A little dab of gloss and ta-da, she’s gorgeous.
I spend way too much money on stuff for my lips. I cannot live w/o chap stick. Period.
Is Girl Talk the one with the Pink Phone? If so, my sister had it and use to make me play it with her and her friends.
Best thing under $15… Starbucks. Yep I said it.
Girl Talk!!! I played that with my friends all the time. Awesome game.
I’m pro lip gloss. The lady who told you it’s for girls is lame. And probably just jealous.
I want that lip gloss.
I can’t really think of a good under $15 purchase right now for some reason. But I’m sure I have many of them considering I’m pretty cheap most of the time.
LOVED Girl Talk! LOVE Lip Gloss.
Best purchase under $15…my birth control pills each month. I’m sure the reason is pretty obvious.
Best purchase under $15 would be my 1984 Pepsi run t-shirt. Every time I wear it someone tells me that they love it and all of my girlfriends covet it. Plus, it’s older than me which means that it has reached the perfect level of softness. It’s pretty awesome.
Yes! Girl Talk. It’s going to sound really silly, but I’m going to tell you anyway that I played the Sweet Valley High board game last weekend. And I lost.
Do they have other flavors of this lip gloss? I’m always on the look out for new lip gloss even though I’m no longer a girl. Next time feel free to punch that lady in the vagina. Also, I’m in love with Fresh Sugar chapstick, but it’s even more than $12. It smells like heaven.
Sweet Valley! Man I loved those books. Lila and her fascination with purple…
i love lipgloss, so that lady can suck it. where do you find this gem? coconut is yummy and id love it on my lips all the time.
totally remember girl talk… loved that game.
also love joseph arthur and it doesn’t surprise me one little bit that you do too.
I totally know that game! I loved it!
Best $12 purchase ever…hmmm. Probably the black satin clutch I got on sale, its actually huge and holds everything.
And that woman is f-ing crazy, in what world does lipstick and/or lip gloss define the change from girl to woman??? What if you prefer to just wear lip balm? Is that limbo? Are you doomed to be a failure at both girl and womanhood?
1 – a funnel for $2 at the hardware store. makes pouring things SO MUCH EASIER. where has this been all my life??
2 – of COURSE i used to play girl talk! are you kidding me?
Lip gloss is just for girls? I love the general public, they’re all nuts.
My best purchase under $15 was two pairs of earrings from Ashley.star’s etsy shop!! Can’t wait for them to come in the mail!
i love the C.O. Bigelow mint-infused (mentha) lipgloss/lipbalm from bath and body works. it’s so great, even my boyfriend uses it all the time! the lipbalm isn’t shiny like the lipgloss, but both of them make your mouth smell and taste minty. i think the balm is SPF15 as well, so that’s another plus. cost: $7. they do have the lipglosses in different shades too.
I love flavored lip gloss. But I never claimed to be a woman either. I’m still just a girl.
I loved Girl Talk! I always thought that was the coolest game but I only got to play it at friends’ houses because my parents never bought it for me.
At this very moment I am thinking the shirt I’m wearing right now from Gap that I purchased yesterday (this one, in brown http://www.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=26680&vid=1&pid=655033) is my best purchase under $15 because it is SO. COMFORTABLE.
And I don’t have to suck in my tummy all damned day. It’s slightly sexy casual but work appropriate. Perfection.
YES! Girl Talk! I had forgotten all about that game. Awesome.
I exclusively wear lip gloss. Well, and chapstick, which in that woman’s world view is probably only for babies. And I am 31, which I’m pretty sure qualifies me as a woman (although I don’t always act like it). :)
I used to LOVE lip smackers vanilla frosting lip gloss (which costs roughly $3). Mmmmmm. One of my friend’s husbands almost left his wife for me because of that lip gloss. But I just bought her a tube and they worked things out. See, lip gloss can bring people together.
What brand is that lip gloss?
I missed out on Girl Talk too, but Pretty Pretty Princess was one of my favorites!
Best purchase under 15$-a pair of Barbie-Hot-Pink pumps from a thrift store.
I got more compliments on those shoes than any pair I’ve ever owned.
And I paid $6.
I’m a little disturbed that after reading a paragraph that included “orgasm,” my first reaction was “I could really go for some Joseph Arthur right now.”
3 bunches of peonies for $5.00 (or 9 for $15!) – made me SO happy!!!
or possibly the $2.00 jean skirt from old navy
Castaner espadrilles I snagged for $10 or one of my (obligatory for San Francisco) snarky t-shirts from threadless.com.
That rattlesnake of a woman can go screw herself. I have never worn lipstick outside of very very fancy occasions and even then, it’s always a very neutral colour. Here’s the thing about lipstick. I have fairly small eyes and thin lips. Playing up the eyes? Makes them look bigger. Piling on the colourful lipstick? Makes my lips look smaller. Go figure.
Ergo, lip gloss is the way to go for gals with facial features like me, and knowing what works for me? Makes me a woman, not a girl. However my personal favourite choice in lip gloss, Lipsmackers, may make me a girl. Who knows. I’m some sort of weird girl-woman hybrid.
Lets start with Girl Talk…I loved that game. But I hated when I wouldn’t do the dare (I hated put an ice cube down your shirt and let it melt…) and I had to wear the little red “zit stickers”. Does anyone still say zit? How awful was that…
Under $15…
MAC has a $12 mascara called plush lash that I love. http://tinyurl.com/mom95k
Free iTunes singles of the week…FREE!
Miss you. x
I love coconut so I will definitely be trying that lip gloss!
Also, I hate lip gloss that looks like you’ve just smeared on lard or dunked a chip into a vat of oil and then ate it.
I never played Girl Talk. I feel so deprived. I felt deprived then and now I feel deprived all over again. Seriously. I’m sad.
Best $15? I think right now I’d say my little iPod cozy from wishcake’s etsy shop. I get a lot of compliments on it.
I remember playing Girl Talk with my cousins. And I will admit to writing my own post entirely on lip gloss.
Olay makes a body wash for the winter called ‘Winter Retreat’. It officially smells like vanilla indulgence. I think it smells like heaven and it feels even better.
The best $15 I’ve ever spent was probably on a CD. BSB, Sugar Ray, Christina Aguilera, Justin Timberlake… take your pick. Definitely a CD.
I would be willing to pay someone to play Girl Talk with me. I never got to play.
That and Dream Phone!
My best 15$>Purchase was probably the an Album by Blue October that got me through a rough time of my life.
Oh, and a Carmen’s Hoagie around here is 7$, and that’s money WELL spent.
Ummm lip gloss = life. I don’t wear lipstick. Gross. And best under $12 spent? Rosebud’s strawberry lip salve. LIVE ON IT!
Sigh lip gloss. Oh the amount of money I could have contributed to my 401k had I not been spending it on shiny, sticky lips.
Best under $15 purchase I make every time is the combo-pack Vanilla Soft Lips with the tinted Pearl Soft Lips. It’s not sticky, it’s SPF 20, and gives me a soft shimmer appropriate for day or night. Boys say its kissable and at $2.39 a package it’s cost-effective enough for me to buy a cheap bottle of champagne to go with it. In fact…Cook’s Extra Dry Champagne at $9.99 *might* trump the Soft Lips, but we were talking about gloss so I went with it.
No wait…Boone’s Farm Strawberry Hill, alc 7.5% at $2.99 a bottle.
That’s it. That’s the best purchase I have ever made under $15.
that woman has no idea what she’s talking about. i have some fabulous lip gloss from victoria’s secret and it is delectable, mmmmm.
always a bunch of tulips. they always make my day.
and lip gloss – LOVE. seriously, we’re not 60. we can still rock it. and philosophy is amazing!
Now I don’t know anything about currency but the best value for money I have is Soap and Glory’s SexyMotherPucker lipgloss which is about eight pounds. Brilliant – everytime I put it on, it makes my lips tingle and it kinda gives me a bit of a buzz. I’ve taken to asking my friends if they want a “hit” of it . . .
Ooh I am so with you Girl Talk and not making out at 14…
I was at Yonkers this one time and there were Liz Claiborne high heeled mary janes on sale. Probably the best pair of shoes I ever bought.
Wait, I take it back. The best pair I ever bought were my kickass wedding shoes. BUT, they were probably the best 15 dollar shoes I ever bought.
It would be a tie between the Clinique Super City Block or the Smashbox Under Eye Brightener. I would cut off a boob for either one if I was poor.
I need to splurge on some lipgloss like that. Yup, $12 is splurging for me.
As for the best thing under $15 I’ve ever purchased? I’m sort of in love with Trader Joe’s Midsummer Night’s cream lotion for like $7.
$12 is a splurge for me too.
I buy too many good things under $15 every time I’m at Ross. I can’t list them all. Recently though, I bought a fantastic pair of gold flip flops with a buckle that are comfortable as all hell and just dressy enough to jazz up an outfit without wearing heels (a shocker for me since I feel short in anything but heels).
OH – and lip gloss if a freakin necessity. I have an entire drawer of them. No less than 100 I’m sure. I have a freakin problem. And I’m probably going to click out of this post and buy this coconut frosting lip gloss immediately. ;)
Girl Talk! Remember the red zit stickers?!?!
I have no idea what my best purchase under $15 has been. That would require me to think and I just can’t do that in my current state of exhaustion/zombie-ism.
LOVE Philosophy’s lip gloss, specifically the (Ooey Gooey) S’mores flavor/color. It’s not overly sweet, the boyfriend loves it and most of all the color is pretty much clear with some sparkles so I don’t need to worry about his face turning colors from all the kisses.
Plus, it seems to last forever. I’ve had the same tube for at least six months and it’s only halfway gone (I apply like crazy).
And thanks for the memories of Girl Talk, the zit stickers and all.
I love lip gloss, I like going to the drug store and getting the ones on sale and stocking up.
I’m pretty confident that woman was an impertinent fool!! I’d love to hear what she has to say to me… I just bought some BonneBelle lip smackers in Melon Kiss!!
Best under $15 purchase (I’ve made many times over) MAC Lipglass! Best stuff ever!!!!
And I am definitely picking up some Coconut Frosting next time I’m out! Thanks for the product tip!
Oh, I need to try this. I love flavored lip gloss, including the ones by Bath & Body Works which make my lips tingle….and it’s well under $15.
I also love Tree Hut Ginger (or Brazilian Nut) Body Butter, which costs about $5. It’s so yummy and creamy!
If lipgloss is for girls, I’m never going to become a woman!
I love their holiday stuff at Bath and Body Works. Every year, I buy a big bottle of Vanilla Bean Noel lotion (for about $10) and it’s like that scene from When Harry Met Sally every single time I put some on.
I have never worn lipstick in my life I don’t think. But I do love some lipgloss and that one looks like it would be heaven!
It won’t surprise you to know that my best under $15 (American) purchase was beer. Stone Brewing Co. IPA, in fact.
Girl Talk was my ultimate favorite game. In fact we re-found it last Thanksgiving and broke it out and played it w/ my sister, aunt and mom. My mom and aunt ended up w/ zit stickers all over their faces! I think I may have even posted a picture of them on my blog but I can’t remember. Anyway, GREAT game.
That lady doesn’t know what she’s talking about! I never wear lipstick! But oh the lip glosses I own…my fave is Neutrogena’s new MoistureShine Cooling Hydragel Lip gloss- it tingles, its yummy and oh I <3 it! (And like you if I could, I'd totally makeout with myself wearing it…I need to find a cute guy to try it out on ;D) Best 8 bucks ever spent :)
Best purchases under $15 include most of my books. I despise lipstick. I am addicted to Dr. Pepper flavored lip gloss. It’s 1-1.50, so I have about four in various rooms.
Golly, you make it *almost* sound like shiny is a bad thing. Shiny is one of my favorite colors! That and grey (goose) vodka.
Girl Talk! I had almost forgotten about that game! Ah! Love it and my 12-year-old self. (Awkward…)
I’m a big lip gloss fan, as well, and while I don’t like coconut stuff, I am all about some cake batter lipgloss. It’s amazing.
My Blackberry, which was free (with the signing over of my soul to Verizon for 2 more years). Which is probably worth more than $15. But seriously… it is my baby, my pet. I don’t know what I’d do without it.
That’s healthy, right?
I’d completely forgotten about Girl Talk until you mentioned it. We used to play it all the time at our slumber parties! Wow.
And PS, if rattlesnake lady defines her womanhood by what she’s putting on her mouth, you could easily wear bowling shoes with your lip gloss and still be more sophisticated.
Girl Talk was just about as fun as Pretty Pretty Princess…I didn’t have either game though. :(
hmmm. best “$15 and under” purchase ever?
tampons.
ha, ha, ha! just kidding. those super-value packs of 54 tamps cost, like, 20 bucks.
okay, okay. for reals. best purchase was probably also (drumroll, please) lip gloss. it was a tube of sephora’s brand in “bronze beauty” and it was, if i remember correctly, around $10. and everytime i wear it, someone compliments me. and i blush modestly, because that means someone’s staring at my mouth, which feels slightly invasive, but then, why the hell do i buy lip gloss in the first place, right?
omg, i have issues.
with love from pittsburgh…
MMM i LOVE coconut, so something tells me that lip gloss would be some kind of wonderful. and in my opinion? COUGARS wear lipgloss so you can tell said lady i said shove it! LOL
love it. and now I have to have it. thanks :)
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When you said Girl Talk I thought you were referring to Dream Phone. I put that game on my Christmas list numerous times and I was disappointed every year… Anyway, it turns out Dream Phone and Girl Talk aren’t the same thing after all.
By the way, it saddens me to hear that some high-powered TV exec has decided to force the questionable ‘talents’ of Piers Morgan on Canadians now. Although I’m glad I’m not the only one who finds him utterly awful to watch.
And yes, I did once buy a goat for someone in a third world country :) I don’t mean to rub it in or anything, but I just thought I’d mention it.