I was feeling listy. It was either this or “Ten Swear Words I Said Today Before 9 am“- I really was going to go with that one but three of them made me blush, that’s why I’m going with this. And before anyone complains, yes- I feel that blogging for almost three years (*holey cheese!) makes me a certified expert on blogging even if I a) don’t own my own domain b) have yet to make single dollar off my blog (but I have got a lot of free stuff?) c) have a nervous breakdown every time I try and change my blogroll/design.
Feel free to add your own. Or disagree with mine. If you dare… (I love how menacing ellipses are)
Ten Things Every Blogger Should Know
1. “The more work and heart and soul you put into a post, the fewer comments you’ll get”. – Peter. (Who knows a thing or 900 gazillion things about blogging. And writing fiction).
2. Blogging can be extremely social or incredibly lonely and some days it manages to be both at the very same time.
3. For every person who decides to leave you a comment lacking feeling or compassion or even logical argument- there’s some absolutely kick ass person in the blogging world who will send you a custom-made diamond encrusted toothbrush because you said you wanted one for your birthday.
I told you. Kick. Ass. Now I just need someone to wash my car with the tears of orphans and get me mink lined seat covers and I’m absolutely set. Exactly 10 months until my birthday. Begin preparations!
4. Blogging solely for comments is like dating solely for sex. Sure it can be fun for a while but it’s ultimately exhausting and leaves you feeling like an empty broken shell. Or you know, you just get tired of doing it.
5. Blogs evolve.
6. If you let it, twitter will take a crowbar to your blog. It’s easy to get caught up in the 140 character limit world where you don’t have to worry about transition sentences and proper punctuation. Where you can tell only the most scandalous line of the story, the most brief explanation of your thoughts. And though I’m a reformed twitter-holic, I still enjoy it. But I have to say, lately I’ve been missing my blog. As much as I miss new episodes of The West Wing.
7. It is possible to fall in love with roughly 800 gazillion people through your blog. Through it, I’ve found some of my favourite writers people – girls who make me laugh, who make me cry, who make me think, who say it exactly how it is. Girls who make me want to dance in the kitchen, who inspire me to be more than I am, girls who always have a kind word to say and a friendly ear to listen .Girls who make prompt me to get more crafty and ones who write in ways that leave me breathless. Girls who get the parts of me no one else gets. And of course, dudes who cheer for the wrong football team- but send excellent (if not late) emails. And dudes who let me bbm them regarding Zac Efron and Ryan Reynolds abs.
8. Linking to some of your favourites will always make you feel incredibly lucky. (You should be reading all of those delights, if you aren’t already.)
9. Short post titles are less annoying. (I have yet to learn this lesson. Proof? See title).
10. A good post should teach you something, cause you to reflect, leave you wanting more or just include a picture of a diamond encrusted toothbrush an awesome song.
* I’ve fallen in love with **Geronimo Stilton. Can you tell?
** It’s perfectly normal to have no idea who this is. Unless you spend your day with 9 year olds- then it’s mandatory knowledge. But in case you were curious about the ‘holey cheese!’ comment, Geronimo is a mouse. He’s also a reporter, but that’s a whole other story.