Congratulations to Miranda and Sarahdotcom for each winning a copy of A Short History of Nearly Everything. Hurrah! Send me your addresses and when the MAIL STRIKE is over, you will get your packages!
Now. Tomorrow is my last official day with my class and let’s just face facts. I’m not mentally ready to let go of my little burritos. Nor am I capable of even writing about them. (Whoa. I just said ‘nor’? Who do I think I am, Charles Dickens?) I’m going to work hard to not cry tomorrow. My ugly cry sounds like a pair of tone deaf whales humping and children shouldn’t be put through that.
So instead of writing something drenched in sap and prompting “FOR THE LOVE OF RYAN REYNOLDS ABDOMINAL MUSCLES, GRAB A HOLD OF YOURSELF WOMAN” comments, I’m going to share a list of things I don’t care about. Because in a world where being labeled ‘careless’ is supposed to be an insult, there are just somethings that I really don’t give a damn about at all. Feel free to add your own ‘don’t cares’ in comments.
10 Things I Don’t Care About
80% 96% 98% of all Facebook status updates
2. Anything related to vampires
3. LINDSAY LOHAN. OR HER DRINKING HABITS. OR HER ARRESTS. OR HER COURT APPEARANCES. OR THE FACT THAT EVERYTIME I WATCH PARENT TRAP, I’M TRANSPORTED TO A BETTER, HAPPIER PLACE. #DENNISQUAID4EVER
4. How many different grains are in my cereal
5. Movies involving Kevin James
6. Any meeting that occurs before 9am or after 3pm
7. Television shows about weight loss
8. Updates on the solidity of your kids last bowel movement (Sadly, this does not always relate solely to item #1 on the list)
9. Recipes that include more than 5 ingredients
10. That after my kids leave tomorrow, I’m totally going to bawl my face right off. This class has been with me during the hardest year of my life and each of them is absolutely brilliant. I will forever be thankful I got to be their third grade teacher.
CUE WHALE HUMPING SOUNDS.