When I was in grade one, I had a reading partner named Claire. Claire and I would choose our favorite books and share a tired, orange beanbag at the back of the classroom. We would read each other the stories and if we tired of reading, we would make up our own versions, which would always include cotton candy and/or a magical unicorn named Rusty.
One day, while sitting with Claire, I farted. Claire first looked surprised, then she started to cry. I asked her what was wrong and she told me I was going to hell. God didn’t let …READ MORE
There are moments when I know what I want to say but really struggle for the right words. You would laugh if you saw me- mumbling to myself as I drive to work, as I fold laundry, as I lay in bed. I envision it would be easier to rip out my heart and put it on my screen, but besides the fact that it would be insanely messy- I don’t think it would be enough. And so, in these moments I turn to the one device a blogger can use when she feels like she has a lot to …READ MORE
Ten Six Things That ROCKED this Holiday Season
1. Quality family time. Even though we play the most competitive board games ever (Risk anyone?) and I got completely schooled, it was still fun. You know, once I was back on speaking terms with my mom. Sure, she may have brought me into the world, but was it completely necessary to dismantle my entire strategy to take over North America in ONE TURN? NO. The answer is NO IT WAS NOT.
2. Time with friends. The friends who are still friends with you despite *2003. The friends who know what …READ MORE
Me: I wish I had a crush.
Andy: A crush? Like, what you had in the seventh grade for guys who still wore sweatpants?
Me: Welll… a grownup version of that. Life is just a lot more interesting when you have that one person you feel all, swoony around.
Andy: Why don’t you wish for a guy to feel that way about you? Or better yet, why don’t you wish for a relationship where BOTH of you feel like that?
Me: Are you nuts?! I’m not ready for that kind of commitment. I like my feelings to NOT be reciprocated, …READ MORE
There are few mysteries that trouble the world as deeply as those relating to the male species. I imagine the dawn of time cave women scratched out their man problems on dusty cave walls lit only by torches that reflected their fat tears which tasted of salt and heartbreak.
Was that too much? Yeah, I thought so too.
In all honesty, I don’t really cry that often over men. I suspect that my ‘tears for a man’ reservoir was ran dry due to one man who left me crying for so long my cheeks forgot what they were like to …READ MORE
When I was in the seventh grade, my friends mom chased me around the house with an electric shock brush.
My friend (let’s call her Victoria), came from a very new- age family. Their house was home to crystals that stood taller than me, dream catchers, a hypnosis room, prayer beads, meditation mats and enough books on new age healing and psychology that I could have paper mached the Empire State building with them. In short, it was 100% different from my home in every way. And some days I loved it (when Victoria’s mom introduced me to reiki), and …READ MORE
I ate breakfast while watching the tide. I had lazy sleeps under a hut. I got over my life long fear of swimming and swam every night in the ocean while counting stars and satellites. I drank tequila and clapped along to the mariachi band. I walked down broken streets in a silk dress while it rained. I laughed so hard I almost peed my pants. More than once.
I discovered that girls are their own worst enemy. That too many women will allow judgment to ruin their holiday, insecurity to ruin their night. I burnt my nose so …READ MORE
It’s funny how this blogging thing can connect us to others in a way that we never really imagined. The people we meet, the friends we make, from all over the freaking world, it’s kind of amazing, right? I mean you go into blogging probably because you have an affinity for writing, you have something to say, you want to get your words out of your mind and out there, and something else happens as a really good side benny, if you’re lucky. Someone from somewhere far away (like Canada!) stumbles across your blog or you fall upon her’s first, …READ MORE
This is my second attempt at this post.
My first one was long winded and filled with deep thoughts on traveling and exploring and (wait for it… ) finding yourself. I swear. It had so many mentions of the word “journey” it could have been a script for a reality television show. There may have even been some Mark Twain action going on (see? I told you. Long-winded. I have it on good authority that it’s impossible to write a post that involves Twain and have it NOT be long winded), but I had to delete it.
Because you …READ MORE
I’m going to level with you.
I’m a list person. Writing down everything I need, want or should do brings me the peace of mind that I can’t get with vodka shots with beer chasers yoga. However, when the to-do list gets insanely long I start adding things that I’ve already done. Just so I can check them off. Because crossing off things on my to-do list rates right up there with licorice and Don Cheadle on my list of things I love.
Sometimes, I completely forget the point of a to-do list and just write a list of everything …READ MORE