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I was thinking tonight about how I don’t know how to swim. I’ve always felt like this was a handicap, something that prevented me from living a life of glamorous weekend getaways, cuddling with Phelps abs (not his face, just his abs), fully appreciating the cuteness that is showcased every spring in the swimwear section of J.Crew. I’ve always seen it as a horrible flaw- yet one I’m too scared to overcome. I’ve never experienced cancer like I am right now. I’ve never had a family member or friend get diagnosed, I’ve never felt engulfed like I do now. Submerged …READ MORE You know, I get it. Me giving marriage advice is like, Tara Reid giving tips on sobriety. Or Kanye West give lessons on modesty. Or Jenna Jameson talking about the virtues of virginity. I think I just compared myself to a porn star. Let’s just move along. As many of you know, the always lovely Renee is getting married. What you may not know is that she’s been my secret idol since she she met Chelsea Clinton and I may or may not have volunteered my life (more than once) to getting her into public office (Renee, not Chelsea). She’s …READ MORE I’ve mentioned before that I swing wildly between complete happiness and utter despair in a single swoop. It’s both a blessing- sad days can often be easily thrown away when I make the choice to be happy and a curse- happy moments mean nothing once sadness invades me. (And for the record ‘sadness invading me’ can occur over something as small as watching a sad car commercial). I am an emotional roller coaster. (That last sentence? Yeeeah. That might be why I’m single. That and the fact that I refuse to date someone who doesn’t love Josh Lyman and indulge …READ MORE Five Truths That Make Me Question My “Girl” Status 1. I would rather attempt to read German car manuals for the next 10 years rather than spend an evening reading the “Shopaholic” book series. 2. I do not (even after repeated attempts) like yogurt. (I know this one doesn’t make sense but I just assume all girls like yogurt. I can’t explain it. My brain is ridiculous). 3. I have not spent oodles of time planning my imaginary wedding. In fact, the only thing I know for sure is that a) I do want to get married and b) I …READ MORE For reasons I will never be able to articulate, I seem to swing violently between being 100% confident in my life and my choices and the direction I’m going- to the other extreme, 100% puddle on the kitchen floor, all emo with mascara stains on my cheeks feeling like I have yet to make a right choice and my life is doomed for failure before I hit thirty. There’s no in between, no grey area, no room to stretch- to accept that some choices might have been successes while others were failures. I paint everything with the same brush: it’s …READ MORE (via) I found this while doing the kind of lazy, uninterrupted online perusing you can only do when you have approximately 873 things to do on your to-do list. I was going to tie this into Earth Day and baby polar bears drowning and the fact that Edward Norton is so smoking hot as an ambassador for the planet that he’s probably a leading contributor to global warming. But in the end I thought I would say that I just liked this. Because isn’t it exactly how you feel when you fall? I’ve always appreciated the fact that …READ MORE The economy is in turmoil. There is war in the world, no one has cured cancer and baby polar bears are dying. I’ve developed a strange love for “Private Practice”, my hair is dry and if it doesn’t stop snowing I’m going to curb stomp Mother Nature. Ashlee Simpson is not only famous, but she’s going to be on the Melrose Place re-make, a show that was very dear to my heart during my formative teenage years. In short, these are trying times my friends. Sometimes though, when a Friday shows up, when I finish a good book, when my …READ MORE November 2006- Start my blog. On a whim. Because I’m killing time before going on a date. My first post talks about how bloggers are pretentious (no really, it does) and how I’m scared no one is going to read my blog. And then, because I’m afraid no one WILL read my blog, I attach my blog url to my email so every “real life” friend will have access to it. (I later refer to this “Blogging Mistake #1“). November 2006- December 2006= No one reads my blog and I do not understand why. Doesn’t the internet know I exist? |
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