I have a student in my class, let’s call him Jake. He’s (secretly) one of my favourite students because he tends to see the glass half full and is grumpy in the most endearing way. He struggles socially and spends a lot of recesses with me as he says “I don’t have friends because my brain has a hard time making some”. He has big brown eyes and his shoe laces are always undone. Jake has a lot of anxiety issues and when I have a substitute at school, he’s so worried about me he works in counsellors office to help …READ MORE
I know. I knoooooooooow. We are only 12 days into the new year and already I’m going to bust my enlightened self all on your ass. But you know, I’ve had entire years where the total learning experiences has culminated in learning: 1. The darker the liquor the more likely you are going to want to stab yourself the next morning 2. When your stack of jeans is almost taller of you, it’s time to stop buying 3. Using your student loan to buy jeans will result in you wanting to stab yourself for 5 years after you graduate.
All …READ MORE
10 Top Lessons I Learned In 2009 (this list is seriously incomplete but a top “23.5 Lessons I learned in 2009″ just doesn’t have the same ring to it. And if there’s one thing I’m about, it’s the ring).
1. Crying in public, sending out 80,000 resumes and begging will not get you a job. Neither will good intentions, great connections and a resume so sparkling it would make Obama’s look shoddy in comparison. A good job will find you when you least expect it. And everyone who says “the perfect job will find you when you are ready”, …READ MORE
I was feeling listy. It was either this or “Ten Swear Words I Said Today Before 9 am“- I really was going to go with that one but three of them made me blush, that’s why I’m going with this. And before anyone complains, yes- I feel that blogging for almost three years (*holey cheese!) makes me a certified expert on blogging even if I a) don’t own my own domain b) have yet to make single dollar off my blog (but I have got a lot of free stuff?) c) have a nervous breakdown every time I try and …READ MORE
I have a healthy ego. I regularly am delighted by my talents (like knowing all the words to this song – just for you Ben), nod in agreement when people tell me I’m great (I assure you, this is a little more adorable and far less annoying than I just made it sound), and marvel at my genius. But people? I’ve got faults. Heaps of them. Truckloads of them. So many that you could stack them up, climb on top of them and touch the moon with your fingertips.
See? I wasn’t kidding.
September has been an amazing month but …READ MORE
Do you ever go to write something and then go read your archives and find a post you already wrote that is pretty much identical to what you were going to write?
And you are both elated (hello link love, let’s just save mamma some typing!) and deflated (I was way funnier two years ago)?
And then you realize you just called yourself ‘mamma’ and you wonder what it says about you when you admit to yourself that you like it?
Saturday is the *birthday. TWENTY EIGHT. I’m sure I’m supposed to be feeling all sorts of things …READ MORE
Want to know what I’m doing at midnight tonight? Here’s a clue: Yes. I own a wand. And a robe. And now internet, you know all my secrets. (I feel like I have to confess: working at a childrens theatre for many years gave me access to a lot of cool props. I didn’t buy the robe for myself. The wand, well that’s a different story.)
(Also? I’m FULLY AWARE of how many wand jokes you are all making right now.)
Please tell me I’m not the only person over the age of 10 who is excited …READ MORE
I’m one of those people who takes photos of meaningless stuff all the time. And then I go and look at my photos and wonder, “why the hell do I have 8 photos of my Captain Crunch cereal box on my camera?”. I blame it on my continuous need to take the perfect photo (and my brain assumes the perfect photo will be of a cereal box- to be fair, a large quantity of beer was inside me during that photo shoot). The downside of this ongoing quest to channel my inner Annie Lebowitz, is that I end up with …READ MORE
For reasons I will never be able to articulate, I seem to swing violently between being 100% confident in my life and my choices and the direction I’m going- to the other extreme, 100% puddle on the kitchen floor, all emo with mascara stains on my cheeks feeling like I have yet to make a right choice and my life is doomed for failure before I hit thirty. There’s no in between, no grey area, no room to stretch- to accept that some choices might have been successes while others were failures. I paint everything with the same brush: it’s …READ MORE