2013 was so much for me. It was just… so much in all the best and hardest ways.
I started dating again (which is an accomplishment in itself if you remember how my previous date had gone). I fell more in love with my job, tackled a lot of personal issues and found myself inching back towards the place of contentment that I used to reside in before things got difficult and my brain chemistry changed and showering became the biggest hurdle of my day.
So I look back grateful. Grateful and relieved that I survived this year. Thankful that …READ MORE
If you grew up like many of my friends did, you grew up with a fear of sounding like Steve Urkle, getting a brain injury from not wearing a bike helmet and being viewed as a bragger if you touted your own accomplishments. Of course you’d smile in public, but any type of praise was dutifully pushed aside with phrases like “Oh thanks, I’m not as good as _________ (insert name of teammate) but I try”, ” I just got lucky”, “My team did most of the work” and/or ” Yeah I did okay”. It was on the car ride …READ MORE
I have a student in my class, let’s call him Jake. He’s (secretly) one of my favourite students because he tends to see the glass half full and is grumpy in the most endearing way. He struggles socially and spends a lot of recesses with me as he says “I don’t have friends because my brain has a hard time making some”. He has big brown eyes and his shoe laces are always undone. Jake has a lot of anxiety issues and when I have a substitute at school, he’s so worried about me he works in counsellors office to …READ MORE
I know I’m not alone in feeling like Life is heavy these days.
I keep trying to find positives, to talk myself up into a good mood- then I feel regretful, as though by marvelling at the deliciousness of french toast or singing to a good song on the radio, I’m not showing enough reverence and respect to how the world currently stands.
To what has happened.
Which then makes me feel guiltier than before.
It’s a vicious cycle of feeling low, then building up to a good mood then feeling guilty about the good mood. Eventually I crawl into …READ MORE
I’m a reader. I read daily, usually after a hot shower when I’m curled up and bed and should be sleeping. As a kid, this was my favourite way to read- gulping in words late at night when my parents had told me to go to bed. The quiet and the darkness allow me to concentrate and dive into books in a way I just can’t do during the day. I love books that engulf me, that have lines so poignant they echo in my insides throughout the day. One of my current favourite reads is “Big Questions from Little …READ MORE
I want you to think of the bucket list that you have. Whether it’s triumphantly displayed on your blog, written shyly in your journal or catalogued in the recesses of your brain right after the recipe for spinach dip your mother gave you, I want you to rename that list “Things I Wish To Do Sometime Before I Die”.
Not very powerful is it?
When death is your finish line, you’re running the wrong race.
Considering that you are a perishable item with an expiry date, we could go further and rename your bucket list “Things I Wish To Do …READ MORE
When you think you are casually bringing up the idea of “summer vacation” to a teacher, the reality is you are inadvertently being a douche. Because teachers and summer vacation don’t exist in the way you think they do. Non-teachers assume that teachers work from 9-3pm, get paid fairly and spend large parts of their day doing crafts. We wear witch earrings on Halloween, celebrate Christmas with carols and go on field trips to fun locales. We are rewarded for our pursuits with two months of pure rest and relaxation, where we will jet set the world with our easily …READ MORE
Congratulations. You’ve done it. You’ve accomplished another year in a world that does not rationalize its choices and often hands out victories and successes, heartache and grief in ways that we don’t always understand and with randomness that we often question late at night when we feel most alone.
We tend to only recognize our achievements when someone else gives them value. It’s when we hear the praise of others that we finally give ourselves the pat on the back we’ve been yearning for. It’s when others tell us we have done well that we admit that- yes, we have …READ MORE
Growing up, I was friends with two really interesting twins. While I was rocking a mushroom cut and Club Monaco sweatshirt, these two girls were shaving their heads and wearing lots of mesh, camo and elaborate necklaces with snake charms. While my mom gave me tylenol for a headache, their mom practiced Reiki and ancient herbal medicines to curb body pains. My home was a standard homage Pottery Barn, their house was a collection of Star Wars collectibles, exotic pets and crystals the size of pre-schoolers. Sleepovers were an exercise in restraint as I practiced acting nonchalant as they fed …READ MORE
At the beginning of the year I always tell my kids a story of me in university. The story of how after busting my ass, I got 17% on my midterm and my professor scrawled “Great Improvement!” on my paper because it was. Math was foreign to me and that 17% was like a solid A in my math deficient mind and a huge improvement from the secure 6% I had got on my last assignment where my poor professor had taken to just writing smiley faces beside my work. I whooped it up after class, passing that midterm around …READ MORE