I went through a phase in my early teens when I was obsessed with jury selection (I mean, who DIDN’T have that phase?) and read every book possible on the topic. This was after the OJ Simpson case and I was convinced that the right jury would have REALIZED WHAT EVERYONE ELSE ALREADY KNEW. I became an expert on how to spot liars, identify psychopaths and establish who wants to wants to chop off your head and use it as a soup bowl so I was convinced I would be up for online dating.
I mean, isn’t that what it …READ MORE
They didn’t tell you how fun blogging could be. How excited you would be when you got your first comment, when you saw your name on someone’s blogroll, when you plucked out a handful of words from the vast English language to make sentence you were proud to write. A sentence that you would re-read because you loved it so much, a sentence that would ring in your head and roll off your tongue like poetry. No, they didn’t tell you that.
They didn’t tell you about the community. My word, the community. The people you would meet, the friends …READ MORE
I have a healthy ego. I regularly am delighted by my talents (like knowing all the words to this song – just for you Ben), nod in agreement when people tell me I’m great (I assure you, this is a little more adorable and far less annoying than I just made it sound), and marvel at my genius. But people? I’ve got faults. Heaps of them. Truckloads of them. So many that you could stack them up, climb on top of them and touch the moon with your fingertips.
See? I wasn’t kidding.
September has been an amazing month but …READ MORE
I was going to start this post as though I was dead and writing to you from the great beyond. But it was high on the creep factor and low on the funny (much like a guy I made many bad choices with). But I felt like I need to make some reference to death since I’ve started getting emails with- “ARE YOU DEAD?”. Which has caused to reflect on the fact that hey, I’m not dead. So I should write something to show that I AM alive, even if I’ve spent every waking moment of the last two weeks …READ MORE
1. I don’t need to spend a Saturday night hanging out with people who saw me during my “Mondetta Sweatshirt = Formal Wear” phase.
2. I still haven’t gotten over the fact that in the sixth grade my arch enemy told people I bought boys deodorant.
3. Umm… reunions are for catching up with people and finding out what they are doing with their lives. That’s what Facebook is for now. And I don’t have to make small talk while stalking. Win!
4. I saw my tenth grade crush the other day and he’s losing all his hair. Oh! And …READ MORE
One of my best friends from high school once told me her parents didn’t fight. Ever. They didn’t raise their voices, they didn’t gesture wildly, no one ever lost their temper. Not once did someone throw a dish or drop the f-bomb. Now, I didn’t grow up in the middle of a war zone but I had grown up with parents who argued occasionally- I thought everybody had. So naturally, I thought her ‘no fighting’ declaration was a lie. And the next time I was over, I asked her mom to tell me the truth.
Because the term ‘mind your …READ MORE
So like every other human alive, I dig free stuff. I also dig books. So when I got an email a few months ago from this woman offering me a free book if I reviewed it, I said yes. Absolutely. And if you lived closer lady? I would want to buy you dinner for your troubles.
See how thoughtful I am?
Anyway, the day my book arrived- “You lost him at hello“, I did a little happy dance. This is exactly the kind of book I’d never have bought, but would be secretly curious about. (Sidenote: Any authors out there? …READ MORE
In the last few weeks I’ve had multiple conversations with people all of whom are in ‘friends with benefits’ situations. Which? Always intrigues me, the way Alaskan cruises or tightrope walking intrigues me- I think they appear fun but I don’t think they are for me.
There’s a gene I think I lack. The “I’m cool with exchanging bodily fluids without caring enough to date you” gene. Don’t get me wrong- I’ve done the walk of shame, I’ve made very many bad choices and have enjoyed every single one. But repeatedly going back to the same person, liking them enough …READ MORE
First of all, if you haven’t read the book and plan on reading the book, just ignore this post. Or, if you’ve read the book and feel so strongly about the book that you’ve already emailed me to lodge a complaint against the comments I’ve yet to make (but are definitely coming) mocking this book? Help keep us both sane and skip this post.
It’s quite possible to like something and still feel the strong, undesirable urge to make fun of it. That pretty much is the basis for my relationship with my brother- or why I’m still watching the …READ MORE