August 30th, 2012 in 30something, I'm yoda. Everyone else is a grasshopper, it makes sense to me, just do what i say, let's still be friends?, oh look! i have opinions., self improvement, something I won't forget, travel, when I go all Dr. Phil on you, who needs a self help book? I want you to think of the bucket list that you have. Whether it’s triumphantly displayed on your blog, written shyly in your journal or catalogued in the recesses of your brain right after the recipe for spinach dip your mother gave you, I want you to rename that list “Things I Wish To Do Sometime Before I Die”.
Not very powerful is it?
When death is your finish line, you’re running the wrong race.
Considering that you are a perishable item with an expiry date, we could go further and rename your bucket list “Things I Wish To Do …READ MORE
June 20th, 2012 in anger and I have sat down for tea, confession of the day, here is my heart, it makes sense to me, it's a long one (twss), oh look! i have opinions., seriously, soapbox, sometimes i get violent, the J.O.B., today i am not funny, when i say it anyway When you think you are casually bringing up the idea of “summer vacation” to a teacher, the reality is you are inadvertently being a douche. Because teachers and summer vacation don’t exist in the way you think they do. Non-teachers assume that teachers work from 9-3pm, get paid fairly and spend large parts of their day doing crafts. We wear witch earrings on Halloween, celebrate Christmas with carols and go on field trips to fun locales. We are rewarded for our pursuits with two months of pure rest and relaxation, where we will jet set the world with our easily …READ MORE
March 4th, 2012 in can you tell I've been reading NO FEAR t-shirts?, i complain because I care, introspection sometimes causes me to drink, it happened this week, it makes sense to me, life lesson, oh look! i have opinions., right on my sleeve, soapbox, the J.O.B. Say you are sitting in Starbucks and you see a woman with a stroller who is struggling to open the door.
You have a choice. Either return to your issue of Glamour newspaper while using your stealth peripheral vision to see who goes to help the woman or you go and hold the door open for the woman.
Say you decide to help the woman. Your morals, your belief in how to behave in any situation, requires you to act. She will say thank you, you will reply with “Oh, it’s no problem!” but inside you are secretly full of glee at …READ MORE
Congratulations to Miranda and Sarahdotcom for each winning a copy of A Short History of Nearly Everything. Hurrah! Send me your addresses and when the MAIL STRIKE is over, you will get your packages!
Now. Tomorrow is my last official day with my class and let’s just face facts. I’m not mentally ready to let go of my little burritos. Nor am I capable of even writing about them. (Whoa. I just said ‘nor’? Who do I think I am, Charles Dickens?) I’m going to work hard to not cry tomorrow. My ugly cry sounds like a pair of tone deaf whales …READ MORE
April 10th, 2011 in AHHHHHHHHHHH!, and then i laughed out loud, Blogroll, confession of the day, i wrote this just for the picture, I'm scared to see the search engine results to this, lists, oh look! i have opinions., quote of the day, who needs a self help book? (via)
1. I love the above image and the message it gives. Because seriously, who hasn’t been there? The second the choice is given to someone else, or you know a coin- you gain the clarity you need to realize what you wanted all along. High-five, Universe. And yes, that’s as deep as I’m going to get on Sunday morning.
2. Stomach bug + vacation time = FINALLY WATCHING “ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT”. I KNOW. I KNOW. It’s like, someone just introduced me to what humor is. I just finished the first season and am alternating between thinking I …READ MORE
March 31st, 2011 in advice, books i'm not writing, I don't know what day it is, i love fragment sentences, i should be a P.S.A., I'm scared to see the search engine results to this, it seemed like a good idea at the time..., it's always easier to say it than do it, it's ironic because I'm Canadian, lists, oh look! i have opinions., self improvement, the title says it all, the world according to me Let’s be clear. I didn’t come up with this list while quoting Gandhi and emptying out the entire contents of my bank account to give to a third world nation. I actually started this list to remind myself how I want to try and live. I easily get caught up in bad habits- and thought tattooing “STOP SWEARING LOUDLY WHILE SHAKING YOUR FIST AT BAD DRIVERS” to my forehead was extreme and a bit too long for my tiny forehead. So I wrote a list to remind myself of how to behave like a normal human being. Some people create …READ MORE
February 24th, 2011 in here is my heart, i'm the sum of my failures and my achivements, it makes sense to me, it's a long one (twss), it's always easier to say it than do it, life lesson, love harder, oh look! i have opinions., relationships, right on my sleeve, self improvement, thank you Eleni, the one that nobody reads because of the title, the world according to me, when i say it anyway, who needs a self help book?, who's the boss now? I’m not sure how it happened.
I could blame “Eat, Pray, Love”. The idea that, when faced with a devastating loss or unyielding heartache of epic proportions, the most courageous thing you can do is to leave. To run. To flee. To explore new lands and discover new people. That anything less than a dramatic exit will not suffice, will not illustrate to those around you just how absolutely crushed you are. That unless I smash plates, book trips to exotic lands, get ill-placed tattoos, take up chain smoking and jeggings- that my sadness does not have a home, isn’t …READ MORE
August 13th, 2009 in advice, Annie Lebowitz is so jealous, Dairy products make the world a better place, hello universe? I love you, i can't believe i have a football tag, i love fragment sentences, i'm the sum of my failures and my achivements, it makes sense to me, it's almost like a meme, life lesson, lists, man I'm such a girl, no i haven't gotten laid, oh look! i have opinions., other people say it better, self improvement, seriously, soapbox, the less i worry the happier i am, the one that nobody reads because of the title, the title says it all, the world according to me, top 10 (picture by me)
1. Flowers will never fix everything, but they sure as hell can’t hurt. (Unless they are my favourite flower- peonies and then let’s face it, they can fix everything).
2. When you are wrong, admit it. When you are sorry, say it. When you are in love, declare it.
3. Sometimes it just won’t go your way. And in those moments, it’s perfectly acceptable to stay in your pajamas, eat a lot of string cheese and watch Regis and Kelly (and secretly hate Kelly for being utterly perfect so early in the morning. Her arms! …READ MORE
July 6th, 2009 in anger and I have sat down for tea, blame country music, confession of the day, don't judge me based on my love for bad music, earning my dork badge, famous people make for good gossip, find the dorkiest sentence in this, games we play, let's still be friends?, lists, music, oh look! i have opinions., the one that nobody reads because of the title, wasting time, when i say it anyway, youtubing it in Fact: I will be unable to tell people I’m going to a Taylor Swift concert this week without squealing like I’m a 14 year old girl. Which is perfect really, because that would make me fit into her actual demographic. (Related fact: This might be the cutest video ever. I’m only glad that I’m watching it at 28 years old instead of 14 years old because it would have just set unrealistic standards of what high school love is like. Not like now… now I watch The Notebook weekly to make sure my expectations are unreasonable.)
Fact: I should be …READ MORE
June 23rd, 2009 in and now you might know everything, Doing my part to help the economy, don't hate me for this, find the great TWSS line!, hello universe? I love you, i love fragment sentences, I sound drunk but I assure you I am not, if you're shallow and you know it clap your hands!, it's a good thing, italics make it appear more thoughtful/interesting, man I'm such a girl, oh look! i have opinions., so egan will LOVE this, the title says it all, when i say it anyway I recently had a rattlesnake of a woman kind and helpful lady tell me that ‘women wear lipstick, girls wear lip gloss‘ WHILE I WAS PUTTING ON LIP GLOSS. Needless to say, her views on FLAVORED lip gloss had her making the face people usually reserve for when they find an old dirty diaper in the backseat of their car. Thankfully, I’m so in love with this: I didn’t care what she said. I almost have an orgasm when I put it on my lips. Well, I’m sure a dude would love it if that happened but I’m just …READ MORE
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quote of the moment "Once you start googling 'unlikely animal friendships', life gets better."
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