September 30th, 2008 in advice, AHHHHHHHHHHH!, blogs, i am slowly going crazy, i hate it when i blog about blogging, i love fragment sentences, it happened this week, school, sometimes i get violent, these are the things that happen to me, this tag is for you Arm!, today i am not funny, what the hell, work, youth If you are someone who wants a lot of traffic on your blog, I will give you a tip: wait until tomorrow night and then write a post titled “Vice Presidential Drinking Games”. I guarantee your traffic numbers will explode- mine did.
The funny thing (and by ‘funny’, I mean ‘distressing enough I wished I had an unhealthy addiction to take the pain away’) about suddenly finding your blog getting thousands of hits a day is that it just increases the amount of people who will find your post and NOT like it. Who will hate what you’ve said, who …READ MORE
August 19th, 2008 in AHHHHHHHHHHH!, and now you might know everything, Annie Lebowitz is so jealous, brookem is awesome!, confession of the day, i can't believe i said that, i know- we all LOVE him, i like scotch & table dancing, i post dated this mofo!, i wish i was water, it seemed like a good idea at the time..., it's a long one (twss), lists, love or something like it, men, oh look! i have opinions., politics, school, teaching, the world according to me, top 10, wasting time, when i say it anyway, you're skimming this one So first of all, thank you for all your well-wishes and crossed fingers/toes/internal organs regarding the job situation. It feels so nice to know that people all over the world (mostly the Mid-West US, but with a smattering of dedicated Russian subscribers who I suspect read solely for vodka references) are rooting for me. I will let you know how it goes. In fact, you will know if I get the job because I will probably write up some subtle post titled ” OMIGOD I GOT THE JOB WHHHHHHEEEEEEE!”, and if I don’t get the job, you won’t hear from …READ MORE
June 14th, 2008 in and then i laughed out loud, charm, it happened this week, pirates, school, something I won't forget, teaching, the J.O.B., Uncategorized, youth The best part of teaching kids is realizing that 99% of their genius goes unrecognized by them. The things they shriek and utter, whisper and shout are the truths their hearts hold but they live at an age where they don’t realize the brilliance of their comments. Genius observations and heartbreaking truths fall from the mouths without a second thought and I run after them scooping them up- writing them down, sharing with parents. Us adults stand together and marvel at their insights while they chase each other, threatening to wipe invisible boogers on each other.
It’s a million mispronunciations, …READ MORE
May 4th, 2008 in charm, happiness, i know too much about magnets, i second that emotion, is it weird this makes me cry?, it happened this week, school, so sappy it hurts, something I won't forget, swimming in a sea of self pity, the J.O.B., thinking, Uncategorized, who needs a self help book?, work, youth I often like to reflect on all the things I didn’t learn in university that I should have. Someone should have taught a class on how to work all the school office equipment (and more importantly, what to do when the photocopier breaks down for the 734th time and your kicking of the machine is getting you dirty looks). Someone should have taught a class on what to have your teacher assistants do- because finding work for them often is the hardest part of my planning. Someone should have taught a class on time management. On the trick to writing …READ MORE
March 5th, 2008 in Bill Schneider wears a lot of funny hats, celiacs, confession of the day, disappointment, don't hate me for this, heaven, i complain because I care, i hate it when i blog about blogging, i know too much about magnets, i love fragment sentences, I should be sleeping, I've fallen into a funk and I can't get up, is it weird this makes me cry?, lists, politics, pretty hair makes me happier, school, secrets, seriously, Slyvia Path has nothing on me, swimming in a sea of self pity, the george, the J.O.B., today i am not funny, when i say it anyway, when it doesn't go my way, who needs a self help book?, work I never wanted to be that blogger who has a google reader number that’s closer to a thousand than zero, but here I am.
I never wanted to be the daughter who would avoid her fathers calls, but here I am.
I never wanted to be a teacher who uses stickers as bribes when she’s at the end of her rope and thinking of tying a noose, but here I am.
I never wanted to be the person who started off every sentence ” I’m so exhausted I can’t…”, but here I am.
I never wanted to be person who …READ MORE
February 25th, 2008 in advice, blogs, friends, i might be addicted to tags, i should be a cheerleader, I should be sleeping, if you're shallow and you know it clap your hands!, it happened this week, let's not talk about how long this took, lists, Me & the Bard, movies, music, p.s. i love me, politics, pretty hair makes me happier, proof i attract crazy, quote of the day, school, sometimes i get violent, these are the things that happen to me, when i say it anyway, work, you're skimming this one, youth I wanted to be clever and tie all this together through artfully worded segues and mindful wordplay, but alas it is of late hour and my brain is not computing.
I’m talking funny. I can feel it. The reason for this is the following:
Cramming in the ‘speare + little sleep + plus frantic excitement over OBAMA’s current run + spending everyday with an army of children who still need to be reminded that scratching their butts with both hands for an extended period of time while in public is considered rude.
So without further delay, we are doing “What …READ MORE
February 13th, 2008 in cnn makes my heart beat fast, happiness, i may write about the west wing forever, i should be a cheerleader, it happened this week, it makes sense to me, it's almost like a meme, lists, men, politics, school, the Blitz, the J.O.B., Wednesday nights make me frisky Happiness is ….
falling asleep at 8:30pm, grade two creative writing, kicking a satisfyingly large chunk of ice off the bumper of my car, an email out of the blue, hearing someone snoring, all green lights, receiving a Valentine still sticky with glue, hearing a speech that moves me to tears, a strawberry margarita with extra salt, clean sheets, big rings, the return of Jack Shepard, homemade meatballs, 15 kids singing along to Jack Johnson, the feel of new socks, getting it, remote car starting action, someone remembering to not put whipped cream on my hot chocolate, computer access, leaving …READ MORE
February 7th, 2008 in and now you might know everything, cnn makes my heart beat fast, confession of the day, famous people make for good gossip, find the great TWSS line!, Gore makes green sexy, i complain because I care, i should be a P.S.A., i'm the sum of my failures and my achivements, it makes sense to me, learning, politics, school, self improvement, the Blitz, the J.O.B., this tag is for you Arm!, who needs a self help book?, work, you're skimming this one, youth Tuesday morning I found myself surrounded by young politicos, as eager as I was to discuss all the political happenings in a country none of us live in. I was subbing and had been invited to visit an old teacher during my prep to listen to his class talk about Super Tuesday. (I suspect he could smell the Wolf Blitzer on me and deduced the dark circles under my eyes were related to late nights watching my love on the telly). The discussion was lively and I have to admit, I learned just as much in that 42 minutes than …READ MORE
January 13th, 2008 in animals can be ballerinas too, famous people make for good gossip, i complain because I care, i hurt, i like scotch & table dancing, just do what i say, school, seriously, teaching, tequila consequences, work, youth I’m blaming a group of 7 year olds with abandonment issues for the mess I’m currently in.
Last week I went back to work and I subbed a grade 1 class where the majority of the class was sick. I’m talking runny noses and hacking coughs. I’m talking vomit on the floor. I’m talking about cold shivers and hot sweats. Flushed cheeks and sore stomaches.
Of course each of those little angels managed to sneeze on me at every available opportunity, then wrap their clammy, germ infested hand around mine and refuse to let go until their sweat made their …READ MORE
Speechless. On Wednesday I taught grade 2. I was warned that the class was fun, but “extremely chatty” (meaning that by 3:15pm I would be wanting to take a few out behind the woodshed and beat them with my shoe), and they didn’t disappoint. I had to pull out my ‘hey! I’m commander-in-chief of this little unit, so take me seriously‘ voice a few times.
However, they were also extremely charming and had the highest ratio of dimples to cheeks that I’ve witnessed thus far while subbing, so I let some chatting slide. There was one girl though, who I …READ MORE
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quote of the moment "Once you start googling 'unlikely animal friendships', life gets better."
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