On writing, Churchill, beavers & “oh la la”

January 3rd, 2011 in a possible regret, because "guilt" is a dirty word, fingers crossed this works, help, I like annoying people by talking about how much i like comic sans, i love fragment sentences, i might be addicted to tags, i need to spend more time on spelling, I sound drunk but I assure you I am not, I'm scared to see the search engine results to this, it seemed like a good idea at the time..., it's a long one (twss), italics make it appear more thoughtful/interesting, love harder, quote of the day, self improvement, swimming in a sea of self pity, the title says it all, today has been crummy, when i ask you to do things for me, you're skimming this one

You know what the weird thing is? (Other than starting posts with a random question) It’s the fact that right now, my world is full of extremes. I’m either locking myself in the bathroom at work with the taps running so people can’t hear me cry or I’m stifling a laugh when one of my students comes to school with a stuffed rodent and proclaims to everyone “Get over here and touch my beaver! I’ve got the softest beaver in the wooooooooorld“. The downside of course, is that a second after you catch yourself smiling, you feel guilty. Like being …READ MORE

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fevah Part II

October 28th, 2009 in and no you can't say world peace, because I can't do report cards 24/7, games we play, harry potter, i complain because I care, I don't know what day it is, it's almost like a meme, just do what i say, karma is going to get you, let's still be friends?, swimming in a sea of self pity, the one that nobody reads because of the title, tomorrow will be better, Wednesday nights make me frisky, when i ask you to do things for me, you're skimming this one

Oh, hi. I’m dying.

Okay maybe not but *whatever the hell I’m battling, it’s currently kicking my ass. Like, if me and this sickness were in a boxing  ring, I’d be pinned to the mat yelling “SWEET MOTHER OF GOD, I GIVE UP, YOU WIN- TAKE EVERY SEASON OF THE WEST WING! TAKE MY VINTAGE WRANGLERS FROM THE 70′S THAT DO WONDERS FOR MY BUM! TAKE AWAY SWEET POTATO FRIES FROM THE EARTH! “, the second the starting bell was heard.

I was feeling tremendously sorry for myself while watching ** Lecture 3 in Game Theory (sexily titled “Iterative Deletion …READ MORE

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Knee-deep In Self Reflection

September 20th, 2009 in 1/2 funny 1/2 serious 100% important, and now you might know everything, bio hazard suits will never be in fashion, i'm the sum of my failures and my achivements, life lesson, oh dear, self improvement, seriously, something I won't forget, swimming in a sea of self pity, the title says it all, these are the things that happen to me, when i say it anyway, when it doesn't go my way, work

I was 19 and working for a water treatment center one summer to earn extra money. I was hired by a friend of my parents and told that the work would be extremely easy. My job description fell under the vague category of “safety coordinator”. I was told to show up at the water treatment center at 6 am and to bring a lunch. I was hesitant about going, the only safety measures I knew were medical procedures I learned watching E.R- and I doubted anyone would need me to (or even let me) perform a tracheotomy with a bic …READ MORE

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What Boyfriends Are Good For

July 7th, 2009 in and now you might know everything, find the dorkiest sentence in this, i complain because I care, I want to make Jim Halpert a mix tape, it makes sense to me, lists, man I'm such a girl, men, single girl stories, swimming in a sea of self pity, the title says it all, the world according to me, you're skimming this one

You know, there was a moment today when I realized that being single sometimes really sucks. Did I get a wedding invitation and not have a date? Was I realizing that there’s no way I was going to be able to eat all the rice krispie squares I made? Did I have an itch I couldn’t scratch?

No. No annnnnd No (and for that last one, get your head out of the gutter).

I was having to drive my car in for an oil change. You know when you have to drive your car in and make sure it lines …READ MORE

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Fact #4627

February 25th, 2009 in anger and I have sat down for tea, confession of the day, i am slowly going crazy, seriously, swimming in a sea of self pity, today has been crummy, vague is vogue, when it doesn't go my way

Today is just going to be one of those days.

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Stretch

January 22nd, 2009 in and now you might know everything, confession of the day, introspection sometimes causes me to drink, seriously, swimming in a sea of self pity, things I don't say outloud, this is what happens when you listen to a sad song, today i am not funny, vague is vogue, when I go all Dr. Phil on you, who needs a self help book?, you're skimming this one

I wake up every day fully aware that I have a good life.

I know this.

I may complain about the cold, but I’ve never been homeless. I may complain about being hungry, but I’ve never starved. I may complain about Paris Hilton but no one has forced me to sit through her sex tape. More than once.

I have a good life.

Last week, I stumbled across this line:

Few people attain great lives, large part because it is just so easy to settle for a good life. – Good to Great

And it’s haunted me.

Do you ever …READ MORE

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The Obligatory Thanksgiving Post (OR What I’ve been thinking about for the last 7 hours)

October 13th, 2008 in AHHHHHHHHHHH!, cnn makes my heart beat fast, dogs, famous people make for good gossip, happiness, holidays, i am slowly going crazy, i need to spend more time on spelling, it happened this week, it's almost like a meme, Josh Lyman needs his own tag, lists, politics, swimming in a sea of self pity, the george, the title says it all, top 10, when it doesn't go my way, your vote matters here

I’m searching to find the laugh inside me right now. After writing yesterdays post where I started off discussing my WORST MORNING EVER, I awoke this morning with the smell of dog vomit in my nostrils.

I’m dog sitting right now and it would appear that my 4 legged sidekick is fighting some sort of gastrointestinal bug. Because the entire house that I’m living in while I watch this dog, was covered with both vomit and diarrhea at 4 am this morning. COVERED. As in, there was so much expelled waste everywhere, I have to assume she didn’t do this on …READ MORE

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Oh karma, you fickle wench

September 15th, 2008 in AHHHHHHHHHHH!, famous people make for good gossip, find the great TWSS line!, Fox is foxy, i am slowly going crazy, karma is going to get you, swimming in a sea of self pity, these are the things that happen to me, work

I’m still reviewing what I’ve done to deserve this.

Is it because I spend my money at Starbucks instead of sponsoring a child? Is it payback for that time I faked sleep to avoid talking to the boy in my bed? Was it all the times I screened my calls, gossiped or is this about that time I lied about what happened on my 18th birthday? Is it because I still listen to Soul Decision and play their music every chance I get?

Deserve what, you ask…

I just found out that my first substitute teaching day will be this …READ MORE

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Whoomp there it is, I thought you knew

July 10th, 2008 in and now you might know everything, because "guilt" is a dirty word, confession of the day, don't judge me based on my love for bad music, family, hello universe? I love you, I've fallen into a funk and I can't get up, learning, self improvement, seriously, so sappy it hurts, swimming in a sea of self pity, when i say it anyway

Let me just say, the title of this post has nothing to do with the content. I just have had that song in my head for the last 3 days and felt the urge to share it with the masses.

You are welcome.

Despite all the evidence to the contrary, I’ve been feeling funky lately. Not “so cool, I’m DC Brain Supreme!” funky, but like “what’s the point of showering and do I really have to get out of bed?” funky.

I blame this on a lot of things- not having a teaching job again for the fall (hello broken …READ MORE

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What they don’t tell you

May 4th, 2008 in charm, happiness, i know too much about magnets, i second that emotion, is it weird this makes me cry?, it happened this week, school, so sappy it hurts, something I won't forget, swimming in a sea of self pity, the J.O.B., thinking, Uncategorized, who needs a self help book?, work, youth

I often like to reflect on all the things I didn’t learn in university that I should have. Someone should have taught a class on how to work all the school office equipment (and more importantly, what to do when the photocopier breaks down for the 734th time and your kicking of the machine is getting you dirty looks). Someone should have taught a class on what to have your teacher assistants do- because finding work for them often is the hardest part of my planning. Someone should have taught a class on time management. On the trick to writing …READ MORE

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